Welcome to the Summer Sizzle Blog Hop Series where 9 Christian Women Blogs share their VERY BEST POSTS all summer long! Friends, I’m so excited about having the opportunity to give you this summer treat. Whether about your faith, marriage, children, or friendships – these posts are those that encouraged thousands of others before you! Kind of like a highlight reel!
Today I welcome my dear friend and fear fighter, Valerie Murray from Cord of 6. You all know my heart for women who live life trapped by the chains of insecurity, fear, and shame. The ones that result because we don’t fully grasp the truth of our identity in Christ. Valerie is a friend who also shares the same heart. She understands what fear does and she knows God’s love has the power to transform our fear into courage and strength![bctt tweet=”Join us for the #SummerSizzle #BlogHopSeries 9 Christian Women Bloggers share their BEST posts all summer long! #MomentsofHope #Summer” username=”lori_schumaker”]
5 Reasons I Failed to Appreciate My Worth
Do you lack confidence? When you think about yourself, are your thoughts positive or negative?
Do you have head knowledge that God loves you but have a hard time believing it in your heart?
Sometimes I can’t believe I still battle feeling insecure. Over the years I’ve gained a lot of confidence, but I still have to put my armor on against the fiery arrows that aim to deflate my worth.[bctt tweet=”I can’t believe I STILL battle insecurity! Don’t fall for these 5 traps! #identity #selfworth #confidence” username=”lori_schumaker”]
I become discouraged when I allow these arrows to pierce me. I lose my sense of purpose. I start doubting God can use me.
Don’t let these 5 traps deflate the truth of who you are.
1. Letting other people define me
You’re stupid! You have no common sense! You’re an airhead.
I believed these words and allowed them to define me as a young girl.
These words crippled me and made me afraid to try new things. I became terrified of failing and looking stupid. And so I learned to live without taking risks. I never tried out for sports or extra-curricular activities. I learned to live in fear.
This is a terrible way to live! I take risks now. Big risks to my ego, like starting a blog. But sometimes I still have to push myself to take more risks. I have to be confident in what God is calling me to do and stop doubting myself.
Friends, never forget, your worth is not defined by people.
Your worth is defined by God. It’s engraved in the scars on his wrists.
2. Being afraid of what others will think of me
People pleasers live in fear of being rejected. I’ve been a people pleaser my whole life. I want you to like me. I want approval. This is also a terrible way to live! You simply cannot please everyone! The Bible says that we should live to please God, not man.
For am I now seeking the favor of men, or of God? Or am I striving to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a bond-servant of Christ. -Galatians 1:10
But Peter and the apostles answered, “We must obey God rather than men. -Acts 5:29
for they loved the approval of men rather than the approval of God. -John 12:43
3. Doubting God’s love for me
Do you know what happens when you doubt God’s love for you? You try and earn His love by being good enough.
Sure. You may believe you’re saved through faith and not by works. But there is a works mentality ingrained in you.
If you do all the right things, then your life will be blessed. Because just maybe you’ll make God proud of you. If you don’t do the right things, then God will be disappointed in you and you will suffer the consequences.
But friends, that thinking is not Biblical.
There’s nothing we can do to make him love us any more. We are already fully accepted. Fully loved. Even when we sin. That’s amazing grace!
When this kind of grace penetrates your heart, you understand God’s love for you. You have confidence in who He made you to be. Just the way he made you. You accept his free gift of salvation and live for Jesus because the gift is wrapped up in grace, not works. That’s freedom.
You can’t do anything to earn God’s love. His love for you is already perfect and complete![bctt tweet=”What happens when you doubt God’s love for you? #identity #insecurity #SummerSizzle #BlogHopSeries” username=”lori_schumaker”]
4. Comparing myself to others
I saw the cover of People magazine titled, “The Most Beautiful Woman in the World.” Who feels good about themselves when they read a title like that? The first thing I did was hate on myself. I wonder what it feels like to be Jennifer Anniston, the most beautiful woman in the world? To look that young at her age. To have no wrinkles. I wonder how much older than her I look? But it doesn’t do me any good to compare myself to Jennifer Anniston!
I left the magazine on the shelf and knew in my heart that to God, every single person He ever made could rock the cover of that magazine.
You can’t compare individuals because it’s their individuality that makes them beautiful!
I love this quote from Cheryl Martin’s book Distinctly You:
“Be authentically you. That’s when you will have your greatest success.”
No matter what your goals are, there will always be someone to compare yourself to. There will always be someone faster, prettier, and more talented. So stop comparing and just be the best you, you can be.[bctt tweet=”Stop comparing and just be your best YOU! #insecurity #identity #worth ” username=”lori_schumaker”]
5. Negative self-talk
Have you ever listened to that voice that talks to you? The voice you hear when you mess up. The voice you hear when you’re scared to take a risk. The voice you hear when you’re not measuring up to your own standards.
You’re a bad mom. You’re so lazy. You’re certainly not the mom you envisioned after 6 years of infertility. You were such a great teacher and now you can barely manage your own kids.
Isn’t that simply awful?!
Do you know what happens when we talk negatively to ourselves? We begin to believe it as truth. When we believe lies as truth we start to mold into the role we have given ourselves and we become stuck.
But when you speak the truth of who you are to yourself you become the person you know God wants you to be. You live out the truth of who you really are. You make changes. Not out of guilt but because you know that God has equipped you to be the best you-you can be.
Instead of letting lies affect our thoughts, let’s fill our minds with the truth!
What has caused you to doubt your worth? How can you encourage someone else to have confidence?
Valerie Murray is a wife of 21 years and a busy mom to 4 energetic children. She writes at about keeping faith and family strong through Christ. Her heart’s desire is to offer hope to others and declare the glory of God in her life through her writing. Her mission is to offer encouragement to struggling marriages, overwhelmed moms and people striving to face their fears and know their worth. Coffee, chocolate and a good movie always makes her happy! You can find her on , , , , & .
Did you miss some of the most popular posts from the #ChosenandWorthy Series? You can find all them right HERE !
Hope is at the heartbeat of living victorious lives. Without hope, what do we have? But to hold onto that hope, there are some things we have to embrace like our identity in Christ, the power of gratitude, and a positive thought life. Would you like extra encouragement to keep you focused on the right things? – The things that will keep your hope alive?
Thank you for joining me here each week to share the hope given to us through Christ. Whether your words come from a story that points to the full healing you have experienced in Christ, or its a story of the journey along the road to the healing you know He is working in you, it is giving hope to others. Your words matter and it honors me to have you share them here in this space!
What I ask of you:
- Share up to 2 URLs (to a blog post, not the actual blog) that resonates with the topic of HOPE. Anything that gives us hope for tomorrow. Hope for victory. The little things and the big. Anything that inspires us to lean into Jesus and let Him carry us through.
Important: If you don’t have a blog post or podcast that resonates with HOPE, join in other ways as you pray and encourage others with a comment or a prayer.
*Please leave a comment on the link just before each of your links. Would you love them well? Encourage them in their efforts to share the hope of Jesus. If you have time, stop by more than one sweet writer’s little corner of the blog world!
Of course, I would love it if you would follow me via my blog and/or social media channels! Signing up to join the Searching for Moments Community gets you access to all of the resources available in the Library of Hope along with post updates and the inside scoop! (Linking up here does give me access to your email which I will utilize only to alert you to details regarding the link-up such as vacations or technical issues!)
Please either grab the #MomentsofHope button found here or link back to me to encourage new linkers.
Finally, find me linking up with these encouraging places![inlinkz_linkup id=719950 mode=1]