7 Truths to Remember When Betrayal Strikes {Series}

The other week I wrote a post titled “When Betrayal Threatens to Shatter Your Confidence” (find it here). The response I received was big and it told me we all share this pain. No one is exempt. Because I believe betrayal erodes the very essence of our belief that life is good, I felt compelled to dig deeper.

A series about betrayal

Betrayal divides, dismantles, and destroys




and community.

Betrayal is based on lies and the enemy is the author of those lies. How we respond has lasting effect. It can cause hurt to ourselves as well as to those around us. And it often leaves its mark on the next generations. With the events happening in our world on a daily basis, it’s time we expose, deal with, and confront betrayal. We need to do something to stop its ugly domino effect of hurt in our world.

I am going to take the next several weeks and explore the truths surrounding betrayal. These truths contain some of the armor, strength, and strategies we need to have on active duty when facing the betrayal that will inevitably interrupt our lives.

Betrayal divides,dismantles,and destroys.How we respond is important #truth #betrayal #hope #searchingformoments Click To Tweet

I’ve come up with 7 truths we must know about betrayal (I’m sure there are more and I’d LOVE for you to share them with me!). Each week’s post will focus specifically on one of these so that we can dig deeper and bring more light to this topic. Today, however, I just wanted to share with you a brief summary of the 7 truths to which I am referring.

7 Truths to Remember About Betrayal

  1. Betrayal and Guilt. The betrayal is in the hands of the betrayer. It is not ours to own and it does not place guilt on our shoulders. The enemy wants us to believe it must be our fault and that we deserved the betrayal, but this is the enemy’s favorite way to use his masterful lies.

… He was a murderer from the beginning. He has always hated the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, it is consistent with his character; for he is a liar and the father of lies. John 8:44 (NLT)

  1. Betrayal and Identity. The betrayal is not our identity. When we are betrayed we can find ourselves harboring feelings of unworthiness. We hear the enemy whisper things like, “You are not worth being respected” and “You were a fool.” People, however, do not betray based upon the worth or level of awareness of those they betray. They choose to betray because of a brokenness deep inside themselves. An unredeemed sin in their hearts is acting out the betrayal.

Jesus answered, “It is the one to whom I will give this piece of bread when I have dipped it in the dish.” Then, dipping the piece of bread, he gave it to Judas, the son of Simon Iscariot. As soon as Judas took the bread, Satan entered into him. John 13:26-27

  1. Betrayal and Unconditional Acceptance. We must unconditionally accept the fact that life is not fair and injustice happens. We cannot avoid it nor is it in our power to stop betrayal. It is only in our power to trust that God will walk us through betrayal.

When Adam sinned, sin entered the world. Adam’s sin brought death, so death spread to everyone, for everyone sinned. Romans 5:12

  1. Betrayal and Revenge. Revenge will not make betrayal better. It will only make our own brokenness greater. We may never be personally witness any type of justice, but our faith assures us that the Lord will take care of the matter.

Do not say, “I will repay evil”; Wait [expectantly] for the Lord, and He will rescue and save you. Proverbs 20:22 (AMP)

  1. Betrayal and Lessons Learned. Betrayal stinks, but it will also allow us the opportunity to grow. Simply being able to look betrayal in the eye and say, “I will buy nolvadex in the usa grow from this”, is defeating the intent of the betrayer. But even more so, is recognizing that on the other side of this betrayal lies a healed heart and new-found joy beyond what we can imagine.

“When a woman gives birth, she has a hard time, there’s no getting around it. But when the baby is born, there is joy in the birth. This new life in the world wipes out memory of the pain. The sadness you have right now is similar to that pain, but the coming joy is also similar. When I see you again, you’ll be full of joy, and it will be a joy no one can rob from you. You’ll no longer be so full of questions. John 16:21-23 The Message

  1. Betrayal and Living Again. We will trust again. Love again. Find joy again.

I’m not saying that I have this all together, that I have it made. But I am well on my way, reaching out for Christ, who has so wondrously reached out for me. Friends, don’t get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I’ve got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward—to Jesus. I’m off and running, and I’m not turning back. Philippians 3:12-14 The Message

  1. Betrayal and the Church. Betrayal represents people as a whole. All people both in and out of the Church. Most definitely there is and will be betrayal in the church, but that does not mean betrayal is the church.

Then Judas Iscariot, one of the twelve disciples, went to the leading priests and asked, “How much will you pay me to betray Jesus to you?” And they gave him thirty pieces of silver. From that time on, Judas began looking for an opportunity to betray Jesus. Matthew 26: 14-16 NLT

My hope is that this series will open our hearts to the brokenness and bitterness betrayal has carried into our lives. With open hearts, we can recognize the effects it has on our lives and be willing to bravely tackle that which is left eating at our souls. Then we can stop betrayal from seeping into the lives of our children and families. I pray you will feel hope in the face of the betrayal that has already befallen you or the betrayal that still may come.

Join us! 7 truths to tackling our response to betrayal #series #truth #armor #strength #strategy Click To Tweet

Lord, thank You for Your wisdom. You knew the broken hearts we would suffer from the fallout of sin and you lovingly gave us the tools and truths in Your Word as a guide with which to face betrayal. I come before you on behalf of every sweet brother or sister effected by betrayal. I ask you to heal our hearts and set us free from any captivity. Set us free from the lies we believe and the bitterness that has planted itself in our hearts.

Lord, the enemy came to destroy us, but You have come and set us free so that we may have a rich and satisfying life (John 10:10). May each of us turn to You as our strength as we look betrayal in the eyes and defeat it and all the effects left in its wake. And Lord, would You please envelope each reader today in your love and assurance of their worth? Remind them that they are made in Your image and that there is nothing more beautiful than that! In the Name above all names I pray … the name of Jesus. Amen.

Friends, thank you so much for joining me each week! I am honored with your presence and pray always that you feel the warmth and love of not only me, but more importantly, of Christ, during your time here.

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  1. So glad you are addressing this topic. I love your 7 truths and can’t wait to see you develop them further. May the Lord give you inspiration and insight!

    1. Angela, Thank you for the encouragement, my friend! Please pray with me that God gives me His words? Ones that will encourage others and give them His eyes to see each situation for the truth of what it really is. And yes – for that insight and inspiration!
      Blessings and smiles,

  2. I really needed this today Lori. God is really speaking to me through you today. Thank you for being his messenger.

    1. Thank you, Laura, for your kind words. I am so very thankful God used my words to touch you today. You are loved, my friend!
      Blessings and smiles,

  3. This is an incredible message, Lori. Your words here are powerful and needed. So grateful to visit with you today! Peace and many many blessings to you, Love! 🙂

    1. Thank you so much, Tai! Please pray with me that God gives me the words He wants others to hear. That He ministers to the hearts of each sweet reader who has had their heart broken by betrayal. Thank you 🙂
      Blessings and smiles,

      1. You are most welcome, Love! And I am praying in agreement with you right now. May GOD bless your every word and just as HIS words are SPIRIT and LIFE you us, may your words be SPIRIT and LIFE to others. In the name of JESUS— Amen and so be it! I will keep this lifted for you! GOD bless you, sweet friend! 🙂

  4. Ifeoma Samuel says:

    Hi Lori, very good you continued this message. I love this message you have shared. Thank you, friend. I am pinning this!
    God Bless

    1. Thanks so much, friend!!! You are a treasure!!
      Blessings and smiles,

  5. What wonderful truths! I can’t wait to read the posts in this series!

  6. Lori, what a powerful truth: “They choose to betray because of a brokenness deep inside themselves.” Thank you, Lori, for sharing your heart at #IntentionalTuesday on Intentionally Pursuing. : )

    1. Hi Crystal, I pray God uses what He has put on my heart to minister to others!Thank you so much for hosting! I’m thankful to be a part of your community.
      Blessings and smiles,

  7. #5 & #7 are attention catchers. They are so true! Many times it’s easy to be confused when betrayed by someone within the church, but they’re human. It’s going to happen. That’s why only Jesus is worthy of the throne and all our praise. Enjoyed the visit today via #coffeeforyourheart.

    1. Hi Kristi,
      Thank you so much for visiting! The Church is such a sensitive topic. It is the place where we can experience such joy and equally such pain. You are so correct, though, only Jesus is worthy of the throne and all our praise!
      Blessings and smiles,

  8. Going to copy this post to use for future use, hits close to home because who hasn’t been betrayed by somebody. I was so disappointed when it happen to me, took me a year to recover from it. God put me in Job23-26 and kept me there till I finally let go of the pain. Great post.

    1. Thank you, Betty! I am so thankful you got to the other side of that betrayal so that your heart could live with joy again. My heart aches for the so many stuck because of the betrayal. Your testimony could be a powerful tool! I look forward to connecting more!
      Blessings and smiles,

  9. Beautiful! “It is only in our power to trust that God will walk us through betrayal.” I love this reminder of turning the situation over to the Lord. My mom always taught us that we may never see the justice of a situation, but the Lord will bring it to pass. It’s nice to know the Lord will serve justice. Thank you for linking up with Thankful Thursdays.

    1. Your mom sure sounds like a wise lady 🙂 Thank you for visiting. I always look so forward to your comments!
      Blessings and smiles,

  10. I can definitely relate to Betrayal and Guilt. Amazing how the one betrayed carries the guilt and shame, in my case for years! Thank you for exploring this topic. Not an easy one!

    1. Thank you so much, Carrie! I am praying God works through this topic. I’m a little nervous stepping out on some tough ones, but I’m following His nudgings! I’d treasure your prayers!!!
      Blessings and smiles,

  11. I think we all have our fair share of betrayal. It’s important to remember that it does not define us but those who betray us. Another beautiful post, Lori. 🙂

  12. My absolute favorite statement in this entire article is: There is and will be betrayal in the church, but that does not mean betrayal is the church. So many people get that wrong, thank you for clarifying today!

    1. Thank you for visiting today, Sarah! I’m so glad you found truth here! It breaks my heart each time I talk with others who have given up on a Church family because of betrayal. One of my dearest friends and biggest followers of Jesus I know, has done just that. I pray God will give at least one other person the courage to try again with eyes wide open as to what the Church can and cannot be. I’d love your prayers!
      Blessings and smiles,

  13. Lesson 2 and 7 speak to me, “They choose to betray because of a brokenness deep inside themselves. An unredeemed sin in their hearts is acting out the betrayal.” Wow, good stuff!! I can’t wait to read the rest of this series!

    1. Thanks so much, Winter! I pray God uses these words to convince women of their worth and value despite the broken world we live in. Only He can do it, and I would be so humbled if He chose to work through my words and thoughts! I was so happy to see your comment here! I always love seeing your beautiful face in the little thumbnail window 🙂
      Blessings and smiles,

  14. Shared! Thanks for sharing with us at #JoyHopeLive!

    1. Thank you so much!!
      Blessings and smiles,

  15. I am looking forward to reading more. As always I love your posts and your ability to tackle some difficult topics. Thanks for sharing on #JoyHopeLive and I hope to see you there again tomorrow.

    1. Thank you so much, Hope! I am always blessed by you and #JoyHopeLive! Your comments and encouragement mean so much. I’m feeling like God has put me on a big mission with this topic and nervousness keeps showing its ugly head! I’d love the prayers!
      Blessings and smiles,

  16. Betrayal is a very ugly thing and hard to ever come back from. I like your perspective and way to look at it though Thank you so much for linking up to Share With Me. I appreciate the linky loyalty and always look forward to seeing you again at SWM. #sharewithme

    1. Thank you so much, Jenny. You KNOW I love seeing your beautiful face show up in my comments each week!:-) You are a blessing!

  17. Lori, this is such a powerful post about betrayal! You cover the stages of how we respond to betrayal so well, with the perfect scripture!! I think we have all faced betrayal and even have betrayed, but God’s grace is restores us to wholeness and peace! Beautifully written and so well thought out! What a gift!

    1. Thank you so much, Kathy! Your words bless me immensely!

  18. Betrayal is a terrible thing and hard to get over, and wanting revenge would be natural, but won’t help things get any better. I’m sure that would just make it worst. One just has to trust in the Lord and let him help get you through all the terrible feelings of guilt, revenge, unworthiness, and learn to forgive and live again.

    1. Hi Linda, Thanks so much for visiting! You are right, trusting in the Lord is what it takes. It is often so difficult to let go and completely trust. Each struggle we walk through can strengthen that trust, though. I am living proof of that!
      Blessings and smiles,

  19. Such a thoughtful post, really provoked some thought, betrayal in any capacity is hard enough to handle. Thanks for posting

    1. Thank you, Charlotte, for visiting and for your kind words 🙂 Blessings and smiles, Lori

  20. So often, the hardest moments in life, seem to be the ones that we need to search for the lessons in. It would be so easy to just stop at the hurt and the pain, and not work through it to grow, but those lessons are so important.

    1. I so agree, Jessica. I know there have been times I’d rather bury myself in a mindless tv show or magazine, but eventually the hurt comes back to the surface. Walking through it is the only way out to a bright place – a place of healing. Thank you so much for visiting!

  21. Lori, this is a great post, full of actionable tips for us to use. Sometimes it’s so hard to forgive someone who betrays us. I’ve taught my kids that we need to forgive, but we also need to remember so that we are not hurt over and over again by the same person, it will stunt our growth. But we can still love these people, pray for them and wish them the best. Most often we are betrayed because these people need something, and hopefully the prayers will help them in life.

    1. I agree, Nikki. Setting those boundaries is so important. Forgiveness doesn’t mean we must draw those that hurt us back into our inner circle. Thank you so much for visiting! I love seeing your cute pic in the profile window!! I always know you will come with such great insight and care. Blessings, my friend! Lori

  22. You have really put so much thought and great advice into this post. Thank you for the insight into the stages and the way to get through such trials that do come in our life.

    1. Thank you, Carrie, for visiting and for your kind words! It is such a difficult walk, but on the other side lies a freedom and peace that is definitely worth the walk!

  23. I think betrayal is one of the worst things – it always involves people that we trusted and it always feels like a knife to the heart. The biggest thing to take away from it all is that revenge is not the way to go. Justice is the Lord’s and we just need to continue on and maybe distance ourselves from that person for a while.

    1. Amen, Leanne! Justice is the Lord’s – our revenge will only hurt us more. I agree, too, it is the worst because it is from someone we grow to love and/or trust. Thank you so much for visiting!