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25 Outstanding Ways to Love Yourself God’s Way

9 Christian Bloggers Share Their Best Posts All Summer Long! - The Summer Sizzle Blog Hop SeriesWelcome to the Summer Sizzle Blog Hop Series where 9 Christian Women Blogs share their VERY BEST POSTS all summer long! Whether about your faith, marriage, children, or friendships – these posts are those that encouraged thousands of others before you! Kind of like a highlight reel! So put down that book for the moment and check out what’s sizzling this summer!

This week I get to share with you someone who cannot help but shine wisdom and compassion. She is someone I go to when I need to get unstuck or hear perspective. Deb Wolf of Counting My Blessings is trustworthy, compassionate, and full of wisdom and grace. So, today as she gives you insight into how to love yourself, know these words come from a place you can trust!



25 Outstanding Ways to Love Yourself God's Way - how to love yourself (

25 Outstanding Ways to Love Yourself God’s Way

I don’t know about you, but I struggle with the idea of self-love. If you Google “love yourself” you’ll find a plethora of thoughts on the subject . . . some good, some not.

So I went to the Bible and searched for “love yourself” there, and…

10 places in the Bible it says, “Love your neighbor as you love yourself.”

But what does love yourself mean exactly based on God’s Word?

How to love yourself based on God's Word? #identity #chosenandworthy #25WaystoLoveYourself Click To Tweet
What if self-love is supposed to look child-like?

And Jesus said:Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.” -Matthew 18:3 NIV

You don’t have to tell little children to love themselves. They are comfortable in their own skin. They know when they’re hungry, tired, and when they need comfort and nurturing. But even more important for our discussion today little children are humble, sincere, trusting, and dependent.

But wait . . . that’s counter intuitive isn’t it? We probably wouldn’t think of self-love as humble, sincere, trusting, or dependent.

Stay with me for just a moment.

What if self-love is supposed to look like humility?

Warren Wiersbe defines true humility as:

  1. Knowing yourself.
  2. Accepting yourself.
  3. Being yourself.

He adds . . . “Humility begins with self-examination and continues with self-denial.”

Self-examination and self-denial—again, not what we think of when we think self-love. But what if…

Self-love God’s way begins with humility.
Because humble self-love is best able to love others.

Let’s take a closer look at Wiersbe’s definition of true humility.

  1. Knowing yourself means getting to know your personality, your values, your gifts and abilities, and your hopes and dreams . . . the you God created.
  2. Accepting yourself comes from having and keeping a vertical perspective. Fixing your eyes on Jesus. NOT COMPARING yourself to others.
  3. Being yourself means living obediently as the one of a kind, God designed person you are. Being yourself means allowing God to use you to fulfill His plans and purposes. It is allowing Him to use you to love others in ways only you are able.
Self love God's way begins with humility ... #25WaystoLoveYourself #identity #chosenandworthy Click To Tweet

I’m not very good at “loving myself” when it comes to giving myself regular “atta girl” pats on the back. I’m not great at self-pampering and I’m definitely not good at getting all warm and fuzzy when I look in the mirror.

But maybe that’s okay.

25 Outstanding Ways to Love Yourself God's Way - how to love yourself

Because I know my:
  1. Personality – I’m a Phlegmatic/Sanguine which means I just want everyone to get along and have fun doing it.
  2. Values – My core values are grounded in my love for Jesus. Values that make me want to follow Jesus’ example of loving God and others.
  3. Gifts and Abilities – I’m a student who loves to teach. I have the gift of gab and I’m getting better at the gift of listening. And I love writing. If you’ve never read my About Deb Page you’ll learn more about me than you care to know.
  4. Hopes and Dreams – My greatest desire is to stay focused on eternal things – loving and obeying God and loving well the people He puts around me. (I probably would have answered something about my kids 20 years ago. So, don’t put too much holiness on this. I’m at my stage of life. You’re at yours.)

For the most part, I know the girl God created. Oh, I’m a work in progress when it comes to the accepting part, but I’m confident if I stay focused on Jesus and stop comparing myself to others I will do a better job there. And I will always try to do better while trusting that I am loved and accepted just the way I am.

As far as being myself . . . I think I’m okay there. Honestly, if I can’t be myself in my sixties when in the world will I start.

So, what exactly is loving yourself God’s way?

Here’s what I think.

25 Ways to Love Yourself God's Way! #identity #chosenandworthy #SummerSizzleBlogHop Click To Tweet

25 Ways to Love Yourself God’s Way

  1. Remember you are valued and precious to God.
  2. Know, accept, and be yourself.
  3. Forgive yourself like God forgives you.
  4. Treat yourself with care and compassion.
  5. Care for your physical needs . . . diet, move and rest.
  6. Refuse to waste time on stinkin’ thinkin’.
  7. Ask for help when you need it.
  8.  Sing, dance, and laugh more.
  9.  Refuse to speak unkind words to yourself.
  10. Say ‘no’ when you need to.
  11. Do something you were created to do every day.
  12. Pursue your hopes and dreams.
  13. Be honest with yourself and others.
  14. Pray – ask God to help you know your strengths.
  15. Pray – ask God to show you your weaknesses.
  16. Pray – ask God for His guidance and help.
  17. Stop and give thanks for your life every day.
  18. Spend time with those you love.
  19. Accept what you can’t change.
  20. Forgive others.
  21. Be bold and try something new.
  22. Believe God has a plan and purpose for you.
  23. Live engaged in every moment.
  24. Be patient with yourself.
  25. Be still – know and love God.

For a printable version of the list, click here.

What do you think? Are you ready to love yourself God’s way?

Remember, loving yourself God’s way equips you to love others His way too.


Deb is a passionate blessing counter who loves to study the ways faith and life intersect. This year at Counting My Blessings, she is sharing The Relationship Project – How One Relationship Affects All Others.

Deb lives in Missouri with her husband and furry child, Sadie now that all of their human children are grown and have little ones of their own. And yes, being a grandparent is the best!

She’s hoping you will join her on PinterestFacebook and Twitter.

 



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38 Comments

  1. Hi Deb,

    I enjoyed reading this. A colleague and I had a conversation the other day about how God made us. We specifically talked about Psalm 139 and the way God knit us together in our mother’s womb. Not just physically but also including our personalities, temperament, emotions, will etc.

    I did a Personality Profile that showed me to be a Melancholy Sanguine: I’m outgoing, upbeat, optimistic and very inspiring. I’m like the sunshine on a cloudy day; I tend to draw people to me. I am relationship oriented. I relate better to people than I do tasks. I LIVE for engaging with people. People energize me. I am highly independent and strong willed etc. I plan to share some of this in an upcoming blog post.

    My colleague said if she had to match me to a Biblical character, it would be Peter because he was interactive. He was the person that reached out. He spread the word. The point of our conversation was to be clear on how God knit me together in my mother’s womb so that I can love myself God’s way. After reading your 25 point list, I can say I indeed do love myself God’s way. Were you a fly on the wall in our conversation?:-)

    Thanks for writing such an in depth post. God bless you Deb!

    1. I really appreciate your insights, Yvonne! It’s amazing how God made each of us and made us so unique!

    2. I love studying the personality types, Yvonne. I would have loved sitting in on your conversation and getting to know a little more about each of you. It’s such a blessing when we slow down and talk with each other and take time to get to know the unique person God created. Thanks and God’s blessings!

  2. Yes yes and yes!!! I absolutely love this Deb! You have so much wisdom and your blog is a wealth of inspiration.
    Thanks for joining the crew here today ??
    Thanks Lori for this exciting series.
    God bless you both

    1. Thank you, Ifeoma! Yes, there are so many truths in this post!

    2. Thank you so much, Ifeoma! You made my day!! God bless you!

  3. This is such a great list Deb! We all need to love ourselves more I think. Especially women, who tend to give themselves away for the sake of their families. Thanks for sharing.

    1. Yes, “women, who tend to give themselves away for the sake of their families.” That is so true! Thank you!

    2. Oh, Patti . . . you’re right! We so easily give ourselves away AND we’re too often hard on ourselves for all the wrong reasons. I need to read and reread this list to remember all the right ways God wants me to love myself! <3

  4. These words are a much-needed push back to the lie that self-love is sin — and to the equal and opposite lie that we “deserve” to pamper ourselves. A right understanding of the deep love of God for His children is healing and healthful! Thanks, Deb — and thanks, Lori, for bringing us the best of the best this summer.

    1. Yes, Michele, that is so true – thank you!

    2. Thank you, Michele! Your encouragement just blesses my heart!

  5. Nicole Kauffman says:

    Love this, Deb! So much truth here! Definitely sharing 🙂

    1. Thanks for sharing, Nicole! We certainly appreciate it!

  6. Great post, Deb. Love how you tied humility to self love. Who would have thought? Love your 25 ideas. This is a needed perspective in our culture of pamper yourself or drain yourself to the bone.

    1. She has such great insights, doesn’t she? Thanks, Theresa!

    2. Thank you, Theresa! Worldly wisdom does love to get us all twisted up when it comes to God’s truths. I just love the fact that when I actually study His Word and follow the truth I find there . . . life is just so much better! Thanks and blessings!

  7. Wonderful insights shared here Deb. When we learn to see ourselves as God sees us, we can humbly live our lives for Him as we show a love like He does. The practical tips are valuable to to make us effective servants of Christ. Love what you ladies are doing with the Summer series blog hop. May God continue to bless you all as your live to serve Him. Have a wonderful week and God bless!

    1. Thank you, Horace! I appreciate you taking time to share your insights!

  8. debwilson2 says:

    Deb, seeing love as being childlike really resonated. Thanks for this insightful post.

  9. Enjoying the amazing blog posts Lori…thank you for sharing such amazing TRUTH!!! ? Passing it on….

    1. Thank you! I’m honored to be sharing such great content from some amazing women!

  10. Deb- I’m not very good at this either. I love the comparision with kids. I have so much to learn from them.
    Tha list is great! Thank you for sharing 🙂

    1. Yes, that’s a great point. We have a lot we can learn, don’t we? Thank you!

    2. Julie, I watch my six-year-old grandson and he just expects everyone to love him. He’s happy and kind and doesn’t compare himself with anyone else yet. I love it! I have so much to learn from him!!

  11. This has been a challenging area for me and I am a work in progress. It seems like the circles I am in the topic is always about putting others first. Yes, I know this is good but in the past I have taken to a level that was unhealthy. As a caregiver’s we can destroy self love all in the name of helping others. I know I have done it. We must practice good self love and care. God wants us too. Always remembering who puts on their oxygen first in the plane. To love others we must take care of us and when we do the love spills right over on to others. I love Deb’s post. Thank you for sharing.

    1. Yes, the oxygen example is always a good one to remember! We can’t do for others when we are feeling run down and depleted. Thank you!

    2. That’s a great point, Maree. Thanks so much for adding it to the discussion. Caregivers need to be cared for too!

  12. Great perspective on how to love yourself. I completely agree with you in that it’s a form of humility when you understand how you’re wired. (And I absolutely love number 6 on the list!)

    1. Didn’t Deb just nail this? I am so grateful for her words here and the way in which she points to Jesus ♥

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  14. It’s so hard to love myself sometimes… Thank you for sharing us some tips to self love!

    1. I am right there with you, friend! When we grasp God’s love and understand that loving ourselves His way is an act of obedience and love to Him, it becomes an easier task. I am praying right now that God gives you eyes to see yourself as He sees you and love yourself as He loves you. Blessings!

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