Even When You Feel God Is Not There

And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord. -Romans 8:38-39 NLT

It seemed that every obstacle possible presented itself.

I knew from the moment I saw her she was meant to be our daughter. With everything in my soul, I believed God’s plan was to unite us as a family.

But why, then, did these horrible things keep happening?

Why were we rejected and faced with the loss of the daughter I was sure was ours? Why would God give me such a deep love only to lose her? How did so much of our paperwork get lost, misplaced, and incorrectly filed? What filled a judge with a spirit of anger toward people she didn’t even know?

There were times I believed it possible God was against us. And if not against us, at the least, He’d just disappeared.  Feeling alone, I questioned my faith and searched my heart. It was an emotionally exhausting time.

It’s difficult sometimes to clear away the effects of our feelings in order to claim what we know is truth. Our feelings simply can’t be trusted, They lead us down paths we never should have stepped even one foot on. It’s confusing, though, because the world says to follow our heart, yet our heart can lead us astray – especially in the middle of heightened emotions and challenges.

God tells us adoption makes a family.

Today I see our daughter’s story and I see God working a powerful good from the pit of all the brokenness that came before. I know that the enemy saw that adoption makes a family and family threatens the havoc he loves to spawn.  So it makes sense. Of course he desired to keep us apart using people, time, countries, governments, paperwork, and confusion as his tools.

But back then the picture wasn’t clear. It took everything in me to let go of my vision of how things were supposed to go and take hold of His. I intentionally forced myself to let go of my feelings and take hold of what I knew to be truth. And it was a daily, if not moment by moment endeavor.

Let go and take hold.

Let go and take hold.

It meant surrendering my feelings – my dream – my longing – again and again to take hold of His.  Then, just as I’d believe I’d completely surrendered, more layers revealed themselves. So back I would go …

Let go and take hold.

Today I can see God never let go. He outsmarted the enemy at every turn, cutting through mountains of red tape and unforeseen circumstances. He put people in our lives willing to do more than what their jobs called for. God helped us meet the right people in the right places to bring our girl home because adoption is His will. After all, He tells us adoption makes a family.

Even now He doesn’t let go.

Since our Selah came home, God has been in the business of breaking down the walls she had firmly placed around herself. Once upon a time she needed those walls as protection from the trauma of her life. Those walls don’t break apart easily. In my own power, I’ve bumped into them often. Sometimes I’ve crashed headfirst and it would be easy to allow myself to slip back to place of no surrender.

But then I remember and I let go and take hold.

He did it before and He can do it again. My job is to pray, read, worship, praise, surrender and trust in the God who loves us more than we can comprehend. He’s doing it day after day here in this home. Healing, redeeming, and from the ground up, rebuilding our family. Not just restoring us to our former good – but building us anew. Stronger. Steadier. Smarter.

We are better.

Friend, God most definitely does not let go. Nothing separates us from His love. His word does not return void. His love is unfailing.

I don’t know what you are living right now. What circumstances have you wondering if God has abandoned you. Or maybe doubting He can still love you because of the sin that has filled your life.

But may I please speak into your life?

Nothing can ever separate you from the love of God. His Word doesn’t say

Most things

Or some things.

It says NOTHING will ever separate you from His love.

Surrender the pain, the dream, or the wall that you are stuck believing protects you. Trust Him and know …

He will never let go.

Our Story of Hope

My new book, Surrendered Hearts: An Adoption Story of Love, Loss, and Learning to Trust, is our daughter’s story … well, actually God’s story of how He didn’t let go. How He did the miraculous. God showed us His unfailing love and I believe – no, I KNOW – He wants to show it to you as well. But to become witness to the changing of what was once impossible to that of a dream come true, we have to surrender. So, are you willing? Are you willing to join me and live surrendered?

Learn more about the book and get the bonus resources HERE!

Buy Surrendered Hearts on Amazon HERE!

In conjunction with the book, I have partnered with Theresa of  Tees Cherished Finds to create a Surrendered Hearts Bracelet! The message to Live Surrendered means that you are choosing to lay down your fears and live surrendered to the One who makes the impossible possible.  When you choose to Live Surrendered, you are committing to following Jesus where He calls. You are choosing to let go of your way and take hold of His way.  And when you purchase a bracelet, just as when you purchase the book, you are supporting adoption and supporting the truth that adoption makes a family. Just click on the image below or in the side bar to make your purchase. Find the Surrendered Hearts page where you can find out more!

Have You Made a Commitment Yet?

A commitment to filling your life with hope? Taking the steps to surround yourself with positive, hope-filled content is a step in the right direction. It pushes the negative away and gives you a chance to tune into the Word of God – the most important Word you can receive. If you haven’t signed up yet to receive updates, you can do so right HERE or below. Subscribing will get you my occasional updates. It also gets you full access to my resource-filled Library of Hope! It has a ton of stuff in it to help you meet life’s challenges head on with the best tool we have – the hope of Christ!